The Dream

I'm walking along the Brooklyn Bridge when suddenly a piece of paper flies into my face telling me to go to this meat market. For some reason, I go. There is a man following me wearing green sunglasses, a large black overcoat and spats. Apparently, he's been following me since I woke up this morning. I walk around the meat market when I see a giant cow painted orange. The man with the green sunglasses then takes this opportunity to grab me and shove a paper bag over my head. I black out. I wake up in a dark and dingy basement with my feet in a bucket of cold water and electrodes are hooked up to my ears. Men in ski masks ask me where I hid the money and where I'm hiding him. I don't know what they are talking about. They ask me why I'm the illegitimate child of Basil Templeton. I do not know Basil. They do not believe me. They then ask me again about the money. How much money? 7.5 million dollars. I am not rich because I apparently live in the meat market and grow orange cows. They ask again about the money and turn on the electrodes. The electricity tears through me and I black out again. I wake up in the Waldorf Hotel and Basil is there thanking me for not turning him in. He says the 7.5 million is in an offshore account in the Caymans that I will receive when I turn 30. But until then, I'm to move out of the meat market and give up the orange cows and buy 3 one-way airline tickets to Brazil, New Zealand, and New Orleans. At the last minute, I'm to decide which one to take. I take a cab to the airport but as we are driving there, a sniper starts to take out people on the street and Basil texts me that I'm in danger. I'm to hop out of the cab and head underground. Somewhere along the way, I acquired a gun and am to use it if I see the man with the green sunglasses. After descending underground, I find myself in the middle of a stampede of orange cows. Thankfully I hold on to a pole from the ceiling and from my high vantage point I see the man with the green sunglasses get trampled by the herd.

Weird. I think I've been reading way to much John Grisham lately. Also, the last movie I saw was District 9 so that explains a few things. Perhaps I should incorporate some more romantic comedies and light-hearted books into my life for the next couple of days.